When we were a bit children we all tried to impress our friends by telling them that our dad was more important than he was. Then we tried to tell our friends that our job or achievements were more important than they were. Middle age is the time when we sadly realise that potential is not the same as achievement, and we’ve probably achieved less than we are capable. So with this in mind I felt that I should go a bit easy on this, where she anoints David Miliband as her preferred candidate for the leadership:

Leader of the Council? Really?

Liz Harsant, the real life leader of Ipswich Council, may have something to say on this. The Conservative group may welcome Bryony with open arms (she’s second favourite to defect among Tory activists) but I’m not sure they think she should be leader yet. Perhaps David Ellesmere, the leader on the Labour Group, may also want a word.

Dame Bryony has many, many jobs, but not leader of Ipswich council.

I was full of anticipation when Gordon Brown announced his list of peers, but I’m afraid that Bridge Ward has been cheated.

It seems that in a typical act of short sightedness Dame Bryony Rudkin is not Lady Bryony. Why is there no peerage for Bryony? If there can be peerages for Floella Benjamin and Guy Richie’s mum, surely the treasure of Bridge Ward deserves her emine. Lady Bryony of Tuddenham Road has a nice ring for the treasure of Bridge Ward.

I suppose the recession, the deficit, the European Constitution and the sale of gold at the bottom of the market are all worse marks against the most disastrous Prime Minister since the War of the Roses, but not by much.

When I said that I always get a reaction when mentioning Mama Rudkin, that was a hint to, well, stop reacting. Hints aren’t always taken, apparently.

One reasonably funny one that came through was “How about an April Fool: Bryony Rudkin to move on to the Maidenhall Estate. Or… Chris Mole backs constituents against government’s plans.”

Well they made me laugh, but that probably says more about me. I think the first is more likely as long as we have a Brown government.

Anyway Ipswich Spy have been going for the prize of most obvious April Fool 2010. Clever concept, though I think their prediction that Labour will gain Whitton was far better, not least because I’m the only one who spotted it.

Whenever I mention Mama Rudkin, I always get a reaction. You’re an unhealthy lot.

We all know that Labour are hoping to regain control of the Borough Council next month. It looks as it will come down to seats in Sprites, Whitehouse and Alexandra ward.

If Labour do sneak back control might they replace their current leader with our own Bryony Rudkin. For all her faults Bryony does have personality and charisma. I would have said presence, but we can’t really say that about Dame Bryony south of the river.

It has long been a mystery to some Ipswich Tories how she was overlooked for the parliamentary seat against a drab Chris Mole. It will appear just as strange if, having regained control of the Borough, Labour continues with the sixth-form (sorry to all the sixth formers reading this) leadership of David Ellesmere and the champion nit picker, Martin Cook. The consensus is that these two gentlemen, although relatively effective opposition nuisance makers, are light years behind Dame Bryony in terms of leadership ability and personality. So if the council does switch back to Labour will it be sixth form prefect or international stateswoman who is handed the torch?

I’ve sent this to Dame Bryony:

Dear Councillor Rudkin,

James Spencer

Edit: I have been honoured with a response from Mama Rudkin:

Dear James,

Bryony

Mama Rudkin’s foreign aid paid trip to South Africa was a great honour to our ward. So I feel cheated, and I’m sure that I speak for many others in the ward that her prediction that the local press would print her pictures of her mid winter holiday for those of us who are stuck in sun starved wintry Britain.

So if Dame Bryony wishes to send me the pictures I will make sure that they get the wide circulation that they deserve.

http://ipswichspy.wordpress.com/tag/bridge/

No, I didn’t make it up.  Irony is really failing me (if it hadn’t already).

From Dame Bryony Rudkin’s very own account of her trip to sunny South Africa:

On our last day in Soweto, on being told by my colleagues that I was an elected councillor, a street trader at once referred to me as “mama” – a term of great respect. What I learnt in South Africa was how that respect can be earned. I’m left with a profound sense of gratitude. Ngiyabonga kakulu.

I really can add no more.

At Bridge Ward News we can understand why “Dame” (it can only be a matter of time) Bryony Rudkin doesn’t have us on her Christmas card list. It hurts, obviously, as we’ve decided that she is one of the treasures of Bridge Ward. OK, she’s not a great representative, but that’s to misunderstand her essence. She can give us something to aspire to, if only we had the Labour Party contacts we too could have £400 a day consultancies and live on Corder Road. We should be happy that she has chosen to grace Bridge with her presence. Chanty’s loss is surely our gain. However it hurts, it really does, that we did not get on a post card from her latest all expense paid holiday, sorry fact finding trip, to South Africa during their summer. She was funded by the International Aid budget, which was a truly creative way of using this budget as some bureaucrat obviously worked out that the presence of Dame Bryony is a greater boon to the poor of South Africa than something dull like HIV vaccines or school text books. Did you hate geometry classes and booster shots? Me too. So we have to once again leap to her defence when those blackguards at Ipswich Spy make sarcastic comments about our Bryony. Hands off our Bryony. She brings light, joy and local government best practices to all who meet her.

As any regular reader of this blog knows we love and cherish Bridge Ward Labour councillors here, particularly those of them who are not good enough to represent where they actually live.  With their nice web design contracts and their £400 a day consultancy gigs they need all the help they can get and on this blog we do the best that we can to help them along.  And I am told that they are duly grateful for this help. 

So in a newly found tradition for this blog I feel compelled to jump to the defence of the councillor for Corder Road and Bridge, Bryony Rudkin.  According to a phone tip offthat I got from one of my readers (who knows about the internal workings of the Labour group a bit more than I do) our Bryony has very probably been attacked by one of her colleagues.  The bully?  The master at the very expensive Ipswich School, comrade Alsdair Ross.  This caller, whose motives are as pure as mine are in defending our Bryony, says that Ross made a post about Ipswich Spy complaining about councillors who turn up late and leave early.  Of course he said that the main culprits were the non-Labour councillors, but there was another unnamed councillor who is apparantly famous for turning up late and leaving early, and to my shock and dismay I learned that this councillor was Bryony Rudkin.

I naturally defended our Bryony by jumping in and saying “yes, she’s done that at almost every meeting we’ve both been at” and made it clear that this despicable tipster was to retail his rumours somewhere else by forcefully telling him, “why are you telling me?” to which this knave cryptically replied “to put in your blog, you idiot.”  Investigative journalism may not have lost a great talent.

So Councillor Ross if you’re going to have a go at one of Corder Road’s, Chantry’s, Bridge Ward’s councillors then do it in the time honoured way by frustrated asides after Labour group meetings with a couple of your closer friends who are likely on a Friday night to phone up irresponsible Tory bloggers; and don’t do it in your blog.